Beauty.

I think of beauty often, as a student in high school I am surrounded by girls on a quest to be beautiful. But they find beauty in superficial things. I am not interested in skin deep things, rather the beauty inside, I would like to show that to girls, that beauty is percieved by what is on the inside, that shines through the skin, beauty is in your character, in your heart.

1 Peter 3:3-4

"Do not let your adornment be merely outward- arranging of the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel,- rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."

I sent this verse to some of my friends last saturday, as I was getting ready for the prom. As I was clothing myself in a lovely ball gown, putting on gold jewelry, placing flowers in my curled hair. I wanted to send out a reminder that although I may look beautiful on the outside that day, that my true beauty is on the inside, and I cannot forget this.

As the day went on I was told I was beautiful countless times. And I felt beautiful. I saw so many fancy dresses and done-up hair at the prom, and i still saw so much searching, and unhappiness. So much discontent.

So how do we gain beauty? Where does it grow? I daily strive to find beauty in honesty, in having a joyful heart, in reality, but really beauty is in God, and if with all i am, i'm seeking God, He will transfrorm my disformed heart into beauty, into purity.

A co-worker of mine prays for me and almost everyone he knows saying the verse, "Blessed are the Pure in heart, for they shall see God." I pray this for myself, for i want to see God too. Having a pure heart is a beautiful thing.

Overall, beauty is within, it is who you are when no one is looking, it is your thoughts, your emotions, your heart. Do you think it's beautiful?

Indifference

"The opposite of Love is not hate, but indifference." - C.S. Lewis

Do you know the deffinition to indifference? I looked it up and according to dictionary.com it means this: 1. Lack of intrest, or concern. 2. unimportance 3. mediocre quality, mediocrity.
The Antynyms for this word: eagerness, responsiveness.

My best friend shared this quote with me the other day, and it started a wave in me. An awareness of the carelessness of the current world and myself , I couldn't count how many times i hear, " I don't care," or " it doesn't matter to me," in a day. And even though phrases like this are used in response to choosing a resturaunt to eat at and what color your mom is painting the walls in her bathroom. Does that matter?

But i realized that this innocent phrases aren't just used in situations like this, they carry over to bigger things. The other day I had a conversation with a co-worker, about the future of the world being carried out by the kids we work with and his response was, "i just stopped careing." But shouldn't we care?

Where do we draw the line, when do we stop caring, and when do we actually care enough, to make something happen. I haven't figured it out yet.

If God is Love, and the opposite is indifference, lack of interest or concern, i don't want to be the opposite, we are made to love.

"And above all things have feverent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8, Proverbs 10:12

I want that deep love God has for us, an eager, a responsive Love. And that's the kind of love i want to give.

glorify.

Is what you're doing honoring Jesus?

My friends and i were talking the other day, and one of them said, "How are you Honoring Jesus by that?" He lives on this question, constantly asking it to himself.

It hasn't left my mind since he said it.

So what am i doing to glorify God?

1 Corinthians 6:20

"For you were bought at a price;

therefore glorify God in your body,

and in your spirit. which are God's."

Glory to God, Glory to God, Glory to God, Forever.

Dear Friend,

I've become pretty concerned about you and I've heard that it really doesn't matter if i'm concerned or not. But i'd like to let you know, although i'm sure you already do know... You are loved by a God bigger than any other created thing, you love a God who truly wants you, every bit of you. I heard recently from a friend something i thought was pretty cool, he said, "God is a devoted husband married to a backstabbing prostitute, no matter what she does, He will love her, and it hurts Him, so so much, but that's the kind of Love God has. We are the prostitutes he is much more than a devoted husband." I thought it was very cool way to look at it, i also am very convicted by it. i'm reminded to be faithful, because i did nothing to deserve God's love in the first place, 3 John 1:4 "I have no greater joy than to hear my children walk in truth." I would love to bring God the joy. It's an honor to live my life as best as i can, for I am nothing without Christ.

So even if you don't agree, or care what i think, people do really care, people are really hurting, and they really do love you, you can change all that by the way you treat them and spend time with them. I know they are hurting and you are too.

But...God likes you, Loves you.

And I just wanted you to know that.

Love you.

1 john 2:3-6 ³We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. ⁴The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. ⁵But if anyone obeys his word, God's love^{b]" style="line-height: 0.5em; ">[b]} is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him: ⁶Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.

"Jesus was a lover, Not a fighter."

"Jesus was a lover, not a fighter, i'm not going to fight you."
A while ago i heard a friend say this and at the time it just clicked to me, if jesus would have fought back, and history would have been different. it would have shown that oppression is okay. Jesus would have been setting the example for using your power against people, that fighting and war was good. Now i see that history was always meant to happen like that, and its' best that it did. So For some reason this phrase just meant so much to me. i thought i'd share it.

i'm the ground and i'm soaking up the puddles

you know how when you go to a convention or a meeting and you leave with a different mindset? and then 2 days later you wake up and its like it never happened, and you're the same as you've always been.

well thats what usually happens to me, thats what happens with inspiration, but when its forgotten..you're back to square one. Except for now.

There was no convention i went to lately. I've been doing everything almost the same as always. But i've been reading, thought provoking books, and fyi books take time to read, multiple days,you have to digest books, think about them, they stay on your mind till after you've turned off the light. I read, Jesus Wants to Save Christians, by Rob Bell. And i read Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller, Now I'm reading Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell and First Things First. And these books they fill my mind with questions, i feel like there is a slow change going on.

My mind is slowly altering its thoughts, i can't focus so much on daydreams and petty plans anymore. I can't. Instead i'm thinking, what if. What if i spoke up today. What if i Did something extreme and out of character, what if i took a challange no one expects. What if i did something totally cool and started something brand new, that has a huge impact on so many. And then How? How will i make a miracle? How do i teach someone without selling them Jesus like he's a commodity. How do I live my life like no ones watching. And still know that they are out of the corners of their eyes.

I hate earthquake changes. Dramatic changes. But a slow change like the groud soaking up puddles. Right now i'm the ground. and i'm taking in the information of a puddle. I'm learning all this and its nourishing me. Its changing my dead grass to green, its giving a whole new season of life to me. Its amazing. I love this feeling. I'm the ground and there is a flood of puddles to take in in this life. And i can't wait for the days to make these slow changes.

I'm the ground and i'm soaking up the puddles.

His Best Piece

I was standing in the back of the auditorium, listening to the Grano brothers perform a piece they wrote, for Tigers Roar. I had 2 days to write a new speech, and they were my inspiration, i had to add in imagination, but i hope you like it, my new speech.

some musiians pull you in so deep
you feel intoxicated in familiarity
you wish you could share their talents and join them on stage
you watch them as i watch him in his best piece

he presses his fingers to the strings
he starts a tempo in his hands
he counts off in his head
then his magic spreads

sound fills the air
he plucks, the steel viberates
his hands strums the string
sweet music begins for me

my mind is soaring ignoring everything else
as i watch him play more and more
the melodies runing and falling
the harmonies dancing above in the air i'm breathing

his music is special
its flowing inside him like the blood in his viens
its branded in his memory
so beautiful, the music he's making

i listen to the rhythm of my pulse
follows the beat of his feet, it does
carrying his strumming hands
making it all flow smoothly

the notes that fill the air
paint pictures in my mind
dancing on a stage, sining in the rain
the guitar is leading, leading the way

the sweet polyphonic rhythms picks up tempo
a more complicated tab ours out of his soul
his fingers are flying between frets
up tuning, down tuning, still he keeps steady

the symphonic sounds of the six strings
more complex to me than it seems
i'm in awe of the music
the magic his fingertips bring

the beauty that coats the crisp air
putting glory into what was previously empty
if only i could keep this in me like the air i'm breathing
then i could fly like i had wings

i'd fly through a staff of music notes
like i'd press the piano keys
my voice would soar in perfect pitch
beauty would live in my fingertips

but i can't capture his magic
its wrapped in his heart
stronger than his mindset
which makes his music perfect

with increddible accuracy, he never misses anything
playing with intensity, unknown to many
i don't even know if he can tell i'm watching
following every graceful movement he's making

he never hesitates, keeps away from syncopation
dynamics are changing...
he lifts his head away from the guitar he's holding
eyes closed, relaxed as can be

his emotions are hidden well
but i know him, he glances out
a smile edging on his lips
pure bliss reflecting in the blue of his eyes

he looks away to his fleeting fingers
now simple strokes and easy beats
replace the overwhelmingly graceful complexity
my awe is in the honey sweet simplicity

the tempo seems to slow
it leaves my heart beating quickly
i wish i could avoid the ending
i'm so afraid to interupt but i want to ask him to keep playing

i know he'd play till his fingers start bleeding
till his muscles are raw and rigid
he'd play till every drop of passion was poured out of him
thill his guitar strings were broken and frayed

he's composing this piece

as if he were writing the story of a life
with every crooked path and uphill battle
every bittersweet loving movement his music is the life he's living

i feel its the finale
the last pulling of the strings
the sound is so quiet my ears are softly straining

to take in every ping of the strings
imprint it on my memory
let it constantly flow through me
and never have an ending

i close my eyes to keep this going
i hear the last viberation of each guitar string
he's brought the sound back to perfect tunning
and in the quiet is one more melodious strumming

what fills the silence is his slow breathing
and the sounds that echo in my memory
i open my eyes
and i know his song was for me